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<!-- Begin
theDate= new Date();
var day = theDate.getDate();
var year = theDate.getYear();
year = (year < 2000) ? year + 1900 : year;
var textdate = (theDate.getMonth() + 1) + '/' + theDate.getDate() + '/' + year;

var numquotes = 31;
quotes = new Array(numquotes+1);
quotes[1] = "Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot actually masturbate. --Dave Barry";
quotes[2] = "The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does not stop until you get into the office. --Robert Frost (1874-1963)";
quotes[3] = "Paradoxically though it may seem, it is none the less true that life imitates art far more than art imitates life.  --Oscar Wilde (1854-1900) ";
quotes[4] = "See what will happen if you don't stop biting your fingernails?  --Will Rogers (1879-1935)   , to his niece on seeing the Venus de Milo ";
quotes[5] = " Skill without imagination is craftsmanship and gives us many useful objects such as wickerwork picnic baskets. Imagination without skill gives us modern art. --Tom Stoppard   ";
quotes[6] = "Applying computer technology is simply finding the right wrench to pound the correct screw.    --Anonymous ";
quotes[7] = "The Programmer's Time-Space Continuum is defined as  Programmers continuously space the time.   --Leon Lanthier ";
quotes[8] = "Paradosfunctionoracle is the term used by technicians to describe the reason no one knows why your computer won't work.   ---J. H. Goldfuss ";
quotes[9] = "No machine will increase the possibilities of life. They only increase the possibilities of idleness.  --John Ruskin ";
quotes[10] = "All programmers are playwrights and all computers are lousy actors. --Anonymous ";
quotes[11] = "Computers are useless. They can only give you answers. --Pablo Picasso (1881-1973)";
quotes[12] = "Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things  in the world that just don't add up.    --James Magary ";
quotes[13] = "Men have become the tools of their tools. --Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862)   ";
quotes[14] = "Multimedia? As far as I'm concerned, it's reading with the radio on! --Rory Bremner   ";
quotes[15] = "Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes.   --E W Dijkstra   ";
quotes[16] = "Where a calculator on the ENIAC is equipped with 18,000 vaccuum tubes and weighs 30 tons, computers in the future may have only 1,000 vaccuum tubes and perhaps weigh 1 1/2 tons.   --Popular Mechanics, 1949 ";
quotes[17] = "Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.   --Andy Rooney ";
quotes[18] = "Looking at the proliferation of personal web pages on the net, it looks like very soon everyone on earth will have 15 Megabytes of fame.  --MG Siriam ";
quotes[19] = "My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them.  --Penn Jillett ";
quotes[20] = "Wow! They've got the internet on computers now!  --Homer Simpson  ";
quotes[21] = "People who buy Macs are the same people who said BETA is better than VHS 15 years ago.  --Anonymous ";
quotes[22] = "Those who do not want to imitate anything, produce nothing.    --Salvador Dali";
quotes[23] = "Adults are obsolete children.   --Dr. Seuss";
quotes[24] = "To write it, it took three months; to conceive it --three minutes; to collect the data in it -- all my life. -- F Scott Fitzgerald";
quotes[25] = "I hope some animal never bores a hole in my head and lays its eggs in my brain, because later you might think you're having a good idea but it's just eggs hatching.  --Jack Handy";
quotes[26] = "Fine art and pizza delivery, what we do falls neatly in between!   --David Letterman";
quotes[27] = "If I have been able to see farther than others, it was because I stood on the shoulders of giants.  --Sir Issac Newton";
quotes[28] = "Advertising is the rattling of a stick inside a swill bucket.   --George Orwell";
quotes[29] = "I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed. --Michael Jordan";
quotes[30] = "It's true hard work never killed anybody, but I figure, why take the chance?  --Ronald Reagan";
quotes[31] = "High expectations are the key to everything.   --Sam Walton  ";


document.write('<i>' + quotes[day] + '</i><br>');
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